Thursday, February 28, 2013
Joke time
When the body was first made, all parts wanted to be boss.
The brain said, "Since I control everything and do all the thinking, I should be boss."
The feet said, "Since I carry man where he wants to go and get into positions to do what the brain wants, I should be boss."
The eyes said, "Since I must look out for all of you and tell you where the danger lurks, I should be boss."
And so it went with the heart, the ears, the lungs, and finally the asshole spoke up and demanded it be made boss.
All of the other parts laughed and laughed at the idea of an asshole being made boss. The asshole was so angered that he blocked himself off and refused to function. Soon, the brain was feverish, the eyes were crossed and ached, the feet were too weak to walk, the hands hung limply at the sides, and the heart and lungs struggled to keep going.
All pleaded with the brain to relent and let the asshole be boss. And so it happened. All the other parts did all the work and the asshole just bossed and passed out a lot of shit.
MORAL: You don't have to be a brain to be boss, just an asshole!
The new planking
No more planking, now it's "Te"oing" - guys showing off their imaginary girlfriends.
Quickie
Seems like every day should start with a quickie, right guys?
I hope it was good for you as well.
How is the Indiana football team like an opossum?
They play dead at home and get killed on the road.
I hope it was good for you as well.
Wednesday, February 27, 2013
Joke time
The boss's wife appeared unexpectedly in his office, and discovered her husband eating lunch—with his pretty secretary on his lap.
"Well," snorted the wife. "Explain this one, you worm!"
"Control yourself, dear," said her husband calmly. "You see all this food on the desk? I had to do something. The waiter forgot to send up a napkin."
Gender bending - part 2
Some more Photoshopped images of people transformed into the opposite sex. On yesterday's post I recognized all but one, today I don't think I can identify any of them. Perhaps you'll have better luck.
Click here to view part 1.
Click here to view part 1.
Sexist office worker tips - part 5
Fifteen more sexist office worker tips. I hope you find them helpful.
You can view part 4 of these tips by clicking here.
You can view part 4 of these tips by clicking here.
