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Friday, November 11, 2022

Text - Messing with people

 50 Funny Harmless Ways To Mess With People

1. Buy a set of “Voice Activated” or “Motion Activated” stickers from Amazon, and the possibilities are endless.

2. Go on Facebook or Instagram and comment on a picture that “The three of you look great!” if there are 4 people in the picture.

3. When at work, tell someone: “I’m going to the bathroom do you need anything?”

4. When you shake someone’s hand, move yours left to right. As they do the traditional up and down, a hilarious circle ensues.

5. Fill your medicine cabinet with ping pong balls whenever you host a party at your home.

6. Say “no pun intended” after a sentence where there was clearly no pun.

7. When driving around city wave at random people as if you knew them. Hilarious to see instant confusion on their faces.

8. Ask, “What was your (or your wife’s/husband’s/sister’s/etc…) name again?” After they answer, shake your head and say, “No… that’s not it.”

9. After giving a compliment, say “no offense” and watch them struggle to find the non-existent insult.

10. Look at a non reflective surface and doing stuff like fixing your hair and checking if there’s something in your teeth.

11. It works best if you are standing, but use your judgment; gradually lower the volume of your voice. Others will match your volume and they tend to move closer. Wait for your moment and just start speaking in a normal or slightly louder than normal voice.

12. Whenever you visit your extended family, bring a bag full of random remotes that you don’t use anymore. Hide them around their house.

13. When someone knocks on the public bathroom door you are in respond with “Come in!”

14. When having a conversation during a meal, specifically only ask questions to people that are chewing.

15. When you’re talking to someone, just keep handing them random items. They’ll just keep taking them without realizing it.

16. Keep correcting them on the pronunciation of your name, even when they are saying it correctly every time.

17. Mess with colleagues during meetings by controlling how they sit. You copy everything they do to start, they lean back, you lean back, etc. Then, slowly, take the lead. If they are sitting back. Sit forwards.

18. Stop in the busy street and start staring into the sky as if seeing something amazing. It doesn’t take long for other people to stop and stare too.

19. Mail someone a red golf ball every week for a while. Then mail them a green golf ball and stop.

20. Put a tiny piece of masking tape over your co-worker’s mouse laser.

21. Carefully step over a non-existing obstacle.

22. When cold-called, make your only response “Whut?” in varying tones. Nothing else. Just “Whut?”

23. Say “High five” to someone, but don’t put your hand up.

24. When someone is talking to you look right over top of their head. Keep the conversation going but look right over them.

25. Glue a quarter to the sidewalk and watch people trying to pick it up.

26. Mistakenly pronounce words mid-sentence only to pronounce them correctly moments later.

27. Text “Turn around!” to a friend when you are not near him.

28. Whenever you’re speaking to somebody who is dominating the conversation, focus on their chin or ear. Look slightly concerned. Every so often flick back to their eyes, but then always make your way back to the one thing. Watch them get increasingly more uncomfortable then eventually just leave.

29. Call one of those “How’s my driving” bumper sticker numbers and let them know that their driving is wonderful.

30. Hand somebody something without any explanation and walk away.

31. If someone asks for your name, saying something like “Jack, but with only one P.”

32. Begin Christmas dinner by serving one’s plate at the table and passing the dish to the right. Pass the next dish to the left. Continue alternating.

33. When you order coffee at Starbucks and they ask for the name, say “Green. Like the sky.”

34. Walk up to a couple of your co-workers. Say, “I just want to tell you both good luck. We’re all counting on you.” Walk away.

35. When they ask what your favorite song or band is, tell them you don’t like music. When they ask why say because there are no pictures like movies and TV shows.

36. Misuse idioms on purpose. “Oh man this turned out to be a blessing in the skies!”

37. Call a stranger and say, “Guess who this is?”

38. When someone asks directions, say something like, “If you take a left out of the parking lot, and go down to the light, then turn right, you’ll be going the wrong direction. It’s actually (give correct directions).”

39. Mail someone a flip flop. No package box, just stamps directly on it, no return address.

40. Take an item to a party and leave it somewhere in the house. For example, a yellow rubber duck.

41. When someone asks for the time: “Excuse me, do you know what time it is?” , say “Yes.” They will reply with “Yes what?”, say “Yes sir!”

42. When waiting for the light to turn green, particularly for a left turn, manually use the blinker at a completely erratic rhythm.

43. Say “I promise.” after saying just about anything. “Here’s a glass of water, I promise.”

44. Call in sick to a place you don’t work.

45. Tell someone you couldn’t do that one thing they asked you to. When they ask what you’re talking about, tap your nose and say “Ah, keeping it incognito I see.”

46. At the deli, ask for the most human tasting meat they have.

47. Bring things to yard sales. It’s easy! Just walk up, and ask how much is this? Then act like that was too much, and put it down.

48. Quietly tell a random person “This is not the appropriate time for this.”

49. If you are at a stoplight with your window down, gesture to the car next to you to roll down their window. If they roll their window down, roll yours up and just carry on.

50. Don’t turn around when you walk into an elevator.

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