Why are New Yorkers so depressed?
The light at the end of their tunnel is New Jersey.
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A description of the perfect morning: You sit down to breakfast and your girlfriend's picture is in Playboy, your son's picture is on the Wheaties box and your wife's picture is on the milk carton.
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Israeli police are conducting a house-to-house search for two men who pulled off a daring daylight train robbery. According to witnesses, the masked pair held passengers at gunpoint, then escaped with $7.50 in cash and $10,000,000 in pledges.
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