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Sunday, November 21, 2021

Text - Medical Dictionary for Rednecks

 Medical Terminology Interpreted by Rednecks… 

Artery – The study of paintings

Bacteria – Back door to cafeteria

Barium – What doctors do when patients die

Benign – What you be, after you be eight

Caesarean Section – A neighborhood in Rome

Cat scan – Searching for Kitty

Cauterize – Made eye contact with her

Coma – A punctuation mark

Dilate – To live long

Enema – Not a friend

Fester – Quicker than someone else

Fibula – A small lie

Impotent – Distinguished, well known

Labor Pain – Getting hurt at work

Medical Staff – A Doctor’s cane

Morbid – A higher offer

Nitrates – Rates of Pay for Working at Night, Normally more money than Days

Node – I knew it

Outpatient – A person who has fainted

Pelvis – Second cousin to Elvis

Post Operative – A letter carrier

Recovery Room – Place to do upholstery

Rectum – Nearly killed him

Secretion – Hiding something

Seizure – Roman Emperor

Tablet – A small table

Terminal Illness – Getting sick at the airport

Tumor – One plus one more

Urine – Opposite of you’re out

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