Joke time

Customer: Waiter, what's the difference between the Blue Plate and the White Plate Specials?
Waiter: Well, Sir, the White Plate Special is $1 more.
Customer: Tell me, is the food really worth the difference?
Waiter: Not really. But we do wash the plate.

Mike: I lost my dog!
Dan: Gee, that's too bad. Why don't you put an ad in the newspaper?
Mike: Wouldn't help. My dog can't read.