Joke time

A husband and wife in their sunset years had been married 60 years and were talking in loving terms about their anniversary. The husband told the wife: "Thelma, I have always wanted to know what you keep in that old hope chest of yours in the attic. Can I take a peek inside?"

"I guess we've been married long enough Sam, what can it matter? Let's go up and you may have a look."

They both make their way to the attic. The husband takes the key from his wife of all those years and opens the lid. Inside the chest is $9,915.00 in cash and three ears of corn. "Why three ears of corn? What does that signify for you?" asks Sam.

"Well, i suppose it was long ago, so here is the truth: every time I was unfaithful in our marriage and slept with another man, I put away an ear of corn" replied Thelma.

The husband is shocked: but after some reflection he thinks... 60 years of a great marriage to a wonderful woman, three ears of corn from long ago, I have no reason for complaint. "Well, it is all OK Thelma, all is forgiven. You've been an otherwise good wife for many years, and I will treasure that forever, " Sam replied. After a little while he added: "Just out of curiosity, there is almost $10,000 here, where on earth did you get it?"

Thelma blushed slightly, then responded: "Well, every time I had a bushel, I sold it."

Joke time

One evening a husband comes home to his apartment, beaten and roughed up.

When his wife sees him she asks, "What in the world happened to you?"

"I got into a fight with the apartment manager!"

"Whatever for?" she asked. "I've never known you to fight before!"

"It was a point of honor," he said.

"What do you mean," she asked.

"He said he had slept with every woman in the complex except one!"

"I can see why you'd be upset at that," she said as she starting applying cold compresses to his wounds.

"I should hope so!" he said, wincing.

"I'll bet," she said, thinking the idea through, "that it's that snooty Mrs. Green on the third floor!"

Hot Dog Infidelity

Joke Time

A middle-aged couple had two beautiful teenage daughters. They decided to try one last time for the son that they had always wanted. After several months, the wife became pregnant and later delivered a healthy boy.

The joyful father rushed to the nursery and was horrified to see the ugliest child he had ever imagined. "We have two beautiful daughters. How could this boy turn out to be so ugly?" he moaned.

Then turning suspicious, he glared at his wife. "Have you been fooling around on me?"

"No, darling," she replied sweetly. "Not this time."