You might be a high-tech redneck if ...
Your e-mail address ends in "@over.yonder.com."
You connect to the World Wide Web via a "Down Home Page".
If the bumper sticker on your truck says, "My other computer is a laptop".
Your laptop has a sticker that says, "Protected by Smith and Wesson".
You have ever doubled the value of your truck by installing a cellular phone.
Your computer is worth more than all your cars combined.
You wire your network with jumper cables.
Your wife said either she or the computer had to go, and you still don't miss her.
You have ever used a CD-ROM as a coaster to set your drink on.
You ever refer to your computer as "Ole Bessy".
Three Words: Daisy Duke Screensaver.
You start all your e-mails with the words, "Howdy y'all."
Your spellchecker knows words like, "Y'all", "Yonder", and "Reckon."
Your cars sit in the yard because your garage is full of dead CPUs, printers, modems and monitors.
Your belt buckle is made from a dead 3.5" hard drive.
You ever felt you had to move your computer desk so it didn't block the velvet picture of Elvis.
Yer mouse keeps knocking over yer spitcan.
Smith & Wesson ... the original point 'n click interface.
When your friends comment on your "nice boots" and you say, "Yeah, thanks. It is my spiffy, new Phoenix BIOS."
When your wife catches you again with your "Farm Animals of the Orient" CD-ROM.
When you order your new pickup truck with a gunrack and PCMCIA sockets.
Your PC Games collection consists of nothing but Bass Fishing tournament games.
You only buy from GateWay, because the cow-colored boxes are a hoot.
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