Joke Time

A man was asked to spare some change for a bite to eat by a particularly shabby-looking homeless man. The man takes out his wallet to pull out a couple of dollars, and then asks: "If I gave you this money, will you buy some Budweiser with it instead?"

The homeless man shakes his head no: he had had to give up drinking years ago.

"Will you use it to gamble instead of buying food?"

"No," says the homeless man emphatically. "How can I gamble? I need everything I can get just to stay alive."

"Will you spend the money on green fees at a golf course instead of food?"

The homeless man stares at him in sheer disbelief: "Are you nuts? I have not played golf in twenty years!"

"Well," says the would-be donor, "I am not going to give you the two dollars. Instead, I am going to take you home for a terrific dinner cooked by my wife."

And now the homeless man is even more confused: "Won't your wife be furious with you? I mean, look at me."

"Hey, man, it's all good! I just want her to see what a man looks like who has given up Budweiser, gambling, and golf."