Monday, November 30, 2009
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Friday, November 20, 2009
Joke - Hotel TV
A friend of mine who works for the government was on a business trip, and checked into a hotel in Washington D.C. in preparation for a meeting at headquarters.
Wanting to ensure he stayed completely on the up-and-up, he remembered to ask about the TV this time, to avoid it appearing on his bill -- which would be examined by government auditors.
"Excuse me," he said to the clerk as he accepted his room key. "I certainly hope the porn channel in my room is disabled."
"No, you sick bastard!" she exclaimed. "It's regular porn!"
Sometimes you have to be really careful how you word things.
Wanting to ensure he stayed completely on the up-and-up, he remembered to ask about the TV this time, to avoid it appearing on his bill -- which would be examined by government auditors.
"Excuse me," he said to the clerk as he accepted his room key. "I certainly hope the porn channel in my room is disabled."
"No, you sick bastard!" she exclaimed. "It's regular porn!"
Sometimes you have to be really careful how you word things.
Fun Images: Dogs
Puppy Soup
Tongue Depressants
Ouch
Speedy
Courageous Dog
 |
| From Chuck's Fun Page 2 |
Tongue Depressants
 |
| From Chuck's Fun Page 2 |
Ouch
 |
| From Chuck's Fun Page 2 |
Speedy
 |
| From Chuck's Fun Page 2 |
Courageous Dog
 |
| From Chuck's Fun Page 2 |
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Friday, November 13, 2009
Frank Feldman
A man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by. He gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says, "Perfect timing, Mister! You're just like Frank."
Passenger: "Who?"
Cabbie: "Frank Feldman. He's a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happened like that to Frank Feldman every single time."
Passenger: "There are always a few clouds over everybody."
Cabbie: "Not Frank Feldman. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand-Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play the piano. He was an amazing guy."
Passenger: "Sounds like he was something really special."
Cabbie: "There's more! He had a memory like a computer. He remembered everybody"s birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But Frank Feldman, he could do everything right."
Passenger: "Wow, some guy then."
Cabbie: "He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Frank, he never made a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good. He would never answer her back even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too -- He was the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could ever measure up to Frank Feldman."
Passenger: "An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?"
Cabbie: "Well, I never actually met Frank. He died and I married his damned widow."
Passenger: "Who?"
Cabbie: "Frank Feldman. He's a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happened like that to Frank Feldman every single time."
Passenger: "There are always a few clouds over everybody."
Cabbie: "Not Frank Feldman. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand-Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play the piano. He was an amazing guy."
Passenger: "Sounds like he was something really special."
Cabbie: "There's more! He had a memory like a computer. He remembered everybody"s birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But Frank Feldman, he could do everything right."
Passenger: "Wow, some guy then."
Cabbie: "He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Frank, he never made a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good. He would never answer her back even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too -- He was the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could ever measure up to Frank Feldman."
Passenger: "An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?"
Cabbie: "Well, I never actually met Frank. He died and I married his damned widow."
Thursday, November 12, 2009
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Blonde Joke
A blonde tried to sell her old car. She was having a lot of problems selling it,because the car had almost 230,000 miles on it.
One day, she told her problem to a brunette she worked with at a salon.
The brunette told her, "There is a possibility to make the car easier to sell, but it's not legal."
"That doesn't matter," replied the blonde, "if I only can sell the car."
"Okay," said the brunette. "Here is the address of a friend of mine. He owns a car repair shop. Tell him I sent you and he will 'fix it'. Then it should not be a problem to sell your car anymore."
The following weekend, the blonde made the trip to the mechanic.
About one month after that, the brunette asked the blonde, "Did you sell your car?"
"No," replied the blonde, "Why should I? It only has 50,000 miles on it!"
One day, she told her problem to a brunette she worked with at a salon.
The brunette told her, "There is a possibility to make the car easier to sell, but it's not legal."
"That doesn't matter," replied the blonde, "if I only can sell the car."
"Okay," said the brunette. "Here is the address of a friend of mine. He owns a car repair shop. Tell him I sent you and he will 'fix it'. Then it should not be a problem to sell your car anymore."
The following weekend, the blonde made the trip to the mechanic.
About one month after that, the brunette asked the blonde, "Did you sell your car?"
"No," replied the blonde, "Why should I? It only has 50,000 miles on it!"
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