Alcohol world records - 15 images

He has a drinking problem

Video: Larry Miller on Drinking

A very funny comedy routine...

Joke Time: Coincidence

A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink.

"Why of course," comes the reply.

MAN #1: "Where are you from?"

MAN #2: "I'm from Ireland."

#1: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's drink to Ireland."

#2: "Certainly."

#1: "Where in Ireland are you from?"

#2: "Dublin."

#1: "Really! I'm from Dublin too. Let's have another drink to Dublin."

#2: "Of course."

#1: "What school did you go to?"

#2: "Saint Mary's. I graduated in '62."

#1: "This is unbelievable! I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!"

About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's going on?" he asks the bartender.

"Nothing much," is the reply. "The O'Malley twins are drunk again.”

Joke Time: Coincidence

A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink.

"Why of course," comes the reply.

MAN #1: "Where are you from?"

MAN #2: "I'm from Ireland."

#1: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's drink to Ireland."

#2: "Certainly."

#1: "Where in Ireland are you from?"

#2: "Dublin."

#1: "Really! I'm from Dublin too. Let's have another drink to Dublin."

#2: "Of course."

#1: "What school did you go to?"

#2: "Saint Mary's. I graduated in '62."

#1: "This is unbelievable! I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!"

About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's going on?" he asks the bartender.

"Nothing much," is the reply. "The O'Malley twins are drunk again.”

Joke - Cop Stop

A cop pulled a man over for weaving across two lanes of traffic. He walked up to the driv­er's window and asked, "You drinkin'?"

"That depends," the driver said. "You buyin'?"

Joke Time

During dinner, a man said to his date, "You know, drinking makes you beautiful."

Puzzled, she said, "But I don't drink."

"I know," he said. "But I do."

Joke Time

A man was asked to spare some change for a bite to eat by a particularly shabby-looking homeless man. The man takes out his wallet to pull out a couple of dollars, and then asks: "If I gave you this money, will you buy some Budweiser with it instead?"

The homeless man shakes his head no: he had had to give up drinking years ago.

"Will you use it to gamble instead of buying food?"

"No," says the homeless man emphatically. "How can I gamble? I need everything I can get just to stay alive."

"Will you spend the money on green fees at a golf course instead of food?"

The homeless man stares at him in sheer disbelief: "Are you nuts? I have not played golf in twenty years!"

"Well," says the would-be donor, "I am not going to give you the two dollars. Instead, I am going to take you home for a terrific dinner cooked by my wife."

And now the homeless man is even more confused: "Won't your wife be furious with you? I mean, look at me."

"Hey, man, it's all good! I just want her to see what a man looks like who has given up Budweiser, gambling, and golf."